2 Timothy 1:15-16 You know that everyone in the province of Asia has deserted me, including Phygelus and Hermogenes. May the Lord show mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chains.
“A real friend is the one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out” – Walter Winchell
The relationships that stand the test of storms are true companions. Real friends stick on, stay, struggle and strive with us when the rest of the world desolates us. Those who distance themselves from us when we are blamed, shamed and detained are just selfish opportunists who came to bask under our success. Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). Paul was deserted by two ‘so called friends’ Phygelus and Hermogenes, during his 2nd imprisonment. We don’t know much about these two men but it is clear from the writings of Paul that he trusted them and longed for their comfort but was brutally rejected.
Yet, Onesiphorus came looking for Paul. It was not easy to trace a prisoner back in those days. There were no prison registers or call centers that could direct them to the prison cell. Onesiphorus was a believer from Ephesus (Acts 19:1–10). Paul’s witness about a sincere friend Onesiphorus was that he searched hard to find Paul, refreshed (or blessed him) and was not ashamed to be identified as the friend of the prisoner for Christ. Real friends stick close when fake ones slither away.
Marks of a true friend:
1. Stay: True friends stay when spurious ones slip away. This is the acid test of sincere friendship when we stand for the truth and are persecuted. A friend loves at all times (Proverbs 17:17a). Those who console and counsel during adversity are friends who become family. The love of the friend does not change with the changing circumstances. True friends stay when the phony ones leave.
2. Sing: A friend sings when the world stings. And at midnight Paul and Silas prayed, and sang praises unto God (Acts 16:25). Paul’s missionary companion and comrade Silas found himself in the prison with his legs fastened to the stocks and his back beaten and bleeding for no fault of his. Paul had delivered a damsel from the demonic spirit of divination and the owners of this slave girl threw them in prison as they realized that their source of sorcery was driven out! Yet we don’t hear Silas sulking but singing praises. A good friend will willingly suffer with us for the truth.
3. Strive: Those who strive in intercession for us are sincere friends. My intercessor is my friend as my eyes pour out tears to God; on behalf of a man he pleads with God as one pleads for a friend (Job 16:20-21). Stand along with those who suffer and strive in intercession.
A true friend sticks closer than a brother.
Proverbs 12:26 The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
Prayer: Father God, give me true friends who will stay, sing and strive during tough times and Lord, make me a true friend. Amen
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