Luke 22:61a-62 The Lord turned and looked straight at Peter. Then Peter remembered the word the Lord had spoken to him: “Before the rooster crows today, you will disown me three times.” And he went outside and wept bitterly.
Bitter tears are emotional tears triggered by anger and resentment. The anger could be towards someone or it could be resentment that has turned inwards. Self-attacking, self-condemning self-demeaning emotions can cause streams of bitter tears. Our tears are 98% water and 2% inorganic substances and salt, but bitter tears have antagonism, sorrow and excruciating pain mixed with every drop. We exercise 43 facial muscles to cry but only 17 to laugh. Crying makes our thyroid gland work harder and our hearts beat faster, but bitter tears break the heart.
Peter wept bitterly as he was disgusted with himself. He had denied His Lord and His Master three times. The third time as he was denying, swearing and cursing Jesus, the Lord’s eyes locked-in with the eyes of Peter. Deep conviction gripped Peter’s heart and he sobbed bitterly in self-condemnation and shame. After Peter was caught red-handed by Jesus, he was not to be found following Jesus to the foot of the cross. Resentful bitter tears pushed him into hiding. Depression, shame and withdrawal symptoms are effects of the bitterness in the soul. Peter could not face Jesus after this incident. Bitterness in the soul will not only swamp us with bitter tears, but will also chain us with shame, stigma and self-condemnation. Crying and repenting is good, but don’t allow the tears to become bitter towards yourself or others.
Jesus paid a special visitation to Peter to wipe away the tears of bitterness and re-commissioned him to his calling. Jesus asked Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” (John 21:15). He will do the same to everyone who repents.
Bitter tears and sobs:
1. Self-Attacking: Bitter tears are self-attacking. Peter was tormented by guilt and would have thought that he was not worthy to serve the Lord anymore. Self-attacking thoughts tell us that we are too broken to be fixed or used. Self-attacking thoughts and tears are destructive and damage our self-image and self-worth. At the barbeque at the beach after His resurrection Jesus uprooted the self-destructive thoughts of Peter and turned them into tears of joy.
2. Self-condemning: Bitter tears tell us that there is no redemption for us. Bitter tears embitter the heart and enmesh us with second-class mentality. They say that we have to settle for the second best as we have fallen beyond redemption. Jesus wiped away the bitter tears of Peter and reinstated Him as the head of the newly birthed Church of Christ.
3. Self-demeaning: Bitter tears defame, demean, disgrace and stigmatize. Withdrawal symptoms are the direct effect of bitter tears shed in private. Jesus turns them into tears of joy. We have to use the 43 muscles to cry as well as the 17 muscles to laugh when we shed tears of joy.
The forgiveness of Jesus turns bitter tears into tears of joy.
Psalm 30:11 “You have turned for me my mourning into dancing”.
Prayer: Dear Holy Spirit, help turn my bitter tears that attack, condemn and demean me, into tears of joy. Amen.
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