John 15:15 I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn’t confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends.
A friend is different to an associate. Friend is someone who loves you unconditionally, who accepts you unpretentiously and understands you unassumingly. A friend does not cause confusion, clamour and calamity but brings clarity to the issues of life. Any other person who does not fit into this definition is only an associate who either enjoys or is benefiting from your company. Associations are important but it is more important to have a distinct line between friends and associates. Jesus showed us the perfect example to build friendships and choose fellowships. Jesus had a close group of twelve, yet He had a closer group of three from among the twelve. As the circle decreases in size, it must increase in value. It was only Peter, James and John who qualified to be in the inner circle of Jesus. He kept the three buddies close to Him when He performed the most amazing miracles. He took them up the mount of transfiguration and also kept them close in the time of despair at the Garden of Gethsemane but only one of them (John) stood with Him when He hung on the appalling cross of Calvary.
Jesus led by example; He loved everyone equally but picked only a few to share secrets. We have no excuses to hate people. We must love everyone yet, be wise to choose our circle of friendship and fellowship. The higher we grow, the smaller the sphere.
Three differences between friends and associates:
1. Respect: A friend will rejoice at our victories and not become envious. 1 Samuel 18:1 Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself. When David won Goliath, his friend Jonathan (the Prince) gave him his robe, tunic, sword, bow and arrow in recognition of the triumph. A true friend will show respect to our gifting, talents and success. Those who become envious of your progress can only be associates. We should love everyone as Jesus did but should share our secrets, dreams and growth only with a selected few. A friend will respect and value your strength, visions and purpose.
2. Protect: A friend protects at all times but becomes a shelter and a shield in crisis. Proverbs 18:24b But there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother. A friend will never backbite or betray; a friend will never be impatient or give up; a friend will never misuse the information you have shared in confidence to their advantage and a friend will never will be judgemental. A true friend will seek your good and stand with you at any cost. A friend protects and is trustworthy at all times.
3. Support: A true friend will not only cover you but will also correct you. Proverbs 27:6 Faithful are the wounds from a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. Correction is different to criticism. Criticism that de-motivates, discourages and demeans is not from a friend but a foe. A true friend’s criticism will boost, advance and enhance you and not debase, degrade or disgrace you. A friend will be accommodative, appreciative and positive of your progress. A true friend is supportive, sincere and sympathetic.
So, choose your friends carefully – Eagles don’t fly with pigeons.
Psalms 25:14 The secret of the LORD is with them that fear Him.
Prayer: Dear Jesus, help me to fully enjoy my friendship with you so, I can recognise genuine, sincere and supportive friends who are around me. Amen
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