1 Samuel 26:9 David said to Abishai, “Don’t destroy him! Who can lay a hand on the Lord’s anointed and be guiltless?
The true test of forgiveness is when our adversary is vulnerable and we choose to bless and not hurt or harm them. We have forgiven the evil doer when we get a chance to slander, defame or tarnish their reputation but we choose to protect and not disgrace them. Medical research has proved that persistent recalling of negative or traumatic experiences will keep the memory refresh for a very long period of time. Bad memories can even last for a lifetime if they are fostered. Incidents that have happened years ago will bleed if they are constantly reopened and replayed. Forgiveness on the other hand is the veneer that covers the stain, smear and slur. Above all, have fervent and unfailing love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). Forgiveness is the balm that heals the wound.
Wounds of betrayal can bleed for years. What we foster will fester. David was battered by wounds of betrayal by his own Father-in-Law. King Saul’s envy turned him into a brutal bloodthirsty beast that hunted for the life of David. Saul tried to pin David to the wall with his spear twice and plotted and pursued to kill him for about 15 years! But when David had two close encounters to kill Saul he chose to forgive him as David feared God and refused to harbour bitterness in his heart. David could have justified his action as self defense but forgiveness and love outshined the darkness of bitterness and hatred. David refused to dig into the betrayal wound.
Healing the betrayal wounds:
1. Reopen: Betrayal wounds take much longer to heal if we reopen, recall and repeat them over and over again. Reopening a wound will expose it to bacterial infection. Infected wounds will start weeping. Pain will worsen; there will be swelling and discharge. Betrayal wounds must be dressed and left to heal.
2. Repay: Repaying evil with good heals betrayal wounds. Overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21b). Find opportunities to repay the evil of the betrayer with good. Don’t slander or spoil the reputation of the turncoat. Rather bless and pray for them to heal the lesion of betrayal.
3. Rebound: The path of recovery from bad betrayal wounds is refreshing your memory with what is good, noble and true and not with the bad, ugly and false. Revisiting the wound can infest the wound with anger, animosity and bitterness. Don’t live in the past; spoil your present and destroy your future. When David was anointed as king he did a search for the remaining bloodline of Saul and honoured them. Recoil with goodness and don’t revisit the betrayal.
Don’t reopen betrayal wounds, repay evil with good and rebound in love.
Matthew 5:39 But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, betrayal wounds are deep and painful. Please wipe away the memories of the ruthless disloyalty with your precious blood and give me the strength to repay good for evil. Amen.
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